On a dating forum, commenter Uncalledfor described a "cliff" in women's attraction—a razor-thin line between desire and contempt. A man offering romantic gestures on a 1-for-1 basis seems safe, but one step too far into over-eagerness flips the switch. She goes from interested to seeing him as a supplicator. There's barely any margin for error. Better to withhold slightly and maintain distance than risk crossing that invisible line where everything collapses instantly.

Women's attraction can flip from hot to cold over seemingly trivial things: one extra text message, calling back a day too soon, remembering too many details she mentioned, or showing appreciation too obviously. A guy might recall a woman suddenly losing interest mid-date or ghosting after what felt like a connection. Meanwhile, a man's attraction rarely shifts the same way—a woman has to do something seriously wrong to turn him off completely. It's asymmetrical and brutal.

Deti, a married man reflecting on young adult dynamics, captured the frustration perfectly: women demand confident alpha men who are also nice, good-looking, successful, and willing to spend money—but not too much, not too often. They want men to approach but only the "right" ones. They want calls or texts, but exactly the right frequency. They want men to push for sex without pushing too hard. The specifics keep changing and are impossible to calibrate.

Men, meanwhile, are genuinely confused. They lose weight, develop game, get good jobs—nothing works consistently. They respect "no sex before monogamy" and offer relationships, only to be rejected for "not feeling it." They try spinning plates, and get called out. They offer commitment, and get accused of moving too fast. The inconsistency feels completely unreasonable, and that's the frame from which male frustration actually stems.